ambiguous equivocations

Underachieving Drunk.
Unaccomplished Consumer of Knowledge.
Unapologetic Armchair Philosopher.
Self-loathing Secularist.
Fundamentally Flawed.

A comprehensive list of things I haven't lost hope in:
Old Scotch.
Young women.
Repartee.
The Sciences.
Literature.
Italian cured meats.

The best consolation in misfortune or affliction of any kind will be the thought of other people who are in a still worse plight than yourself; and this is a form of consolation open to every one. But what an awful fate this means for mankind as a whole!

We are like lambs in a field, disporting themselves under the eye of the butcher, who chooses out first one and then another for his prey. So it is that in our good days we are all unconscious of the evil Fate may have presently in store for us—sickness, poverty, mutilation, loss of sight or reason.

—Arthur Schopenhauer, Studies in Pessimism (via depressionparty)

The most perfect human being ever.
In the penultimate episode of the show that made it OK to be broken.

Dr. Remy “13” Hadley.
Miss Olivia Wilde.
Take a bow.

(Source: kswhateverspace)

I don’t smoke and Carl Sagan is dead, but if I did and he wasn’t, I’d smoke the shit out of some pot with him.

Yeah. 
That’s what I’d do.

I don’t smoke and Carl Sagan is dead, but if I did and he wasn’t, I’d smoke the shit out of some pot with him.

Yeah.
That’s what I’d do.

(Source: topherchris, via fuckyeahdementia)

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

I’m apprehensive to follow herd mentality, but it’s well deserved.
You’ve entertained so many of us over the years, MCA. It’s been a pleasure.

“Plato’s the smartest man that ever lived. He said it was okay to lie if it truly benefits the cause of the people. Cocksucker called it ‘the noble lie.’”
-Bubbles

“Plato’s the smartest man that ever lived. He said it was okay to lie if it truly benefits the cause of the people. Cocksucker called it ‘the noble lie.’”
-Bubbles

(Source: higher-primates, via northamerifuck)

Oh, Gregor. My life is becoming more and more Kafka-esque too.

Oh, Gregor. My life is becoming more and more Kafka-esque too.

(via depressionparty)

Of course you’re right, Slick Willy. Of course you are.

Of course you’re right, Slick Willy. Of course you are.

(via memewhore)

Bahahahahaha. Fuckin’ Gary Busey

Bahahahahaha. Fuckin’ Gary Busey

(Source: memewhore)

Too much television in one picture.

Too much television in one picture.

(Source: memewhore)

Also, it’s not a hockey soda but someone has to drink the Easter leftovers. #PuckFittsburgh

Also, it’s not a hockey soda but someone has to drink the Easter leftovers. #PuckFittsburgh